Invited to Uninvited Living Loved When You Feel Less…

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A Book Review (of Sorts) of Uninvited by Lisa Terkeurst

Several years back a friend’s daughter seemed to be struggling with feeling rejected by her social group. I came across Uninvited and a small voice told me to get it and gift it to Anna. I did so and I didn’t think about it again.

That is until my own daughter left on an overseas trip and left me a birthday present – yup, you guessed it, my own copy of Uninvited. I loved the cover and thought what an interesting happenstance. Yet, somehow, the book made it into an end table drawer – unread for over a year.

Please note that this article contains affiliate links. You can read my full disclosure at the bottom of the page.

Uninvited by Lysa Terkuest, a book review of sorts...

Providentially, I opened that end table drawer at the exact time I needed the message in the book the most. I had literally been Uninvited from a huge part of my life. Uninvited from my social group.

Needless to say, I inhaled Uninvited! And it was and continues to be a message from my Maker that I need desperately.

“Thou dost keep him in perfect peace,
    whose mind is stayed on thee,
    because he trusts in thee.
Trust in the Lord forever,
    for the Lord God
   is an everlasting rock.”

Isaiah 26:3-4

Uninvited Invites You to Remember That…

“Rejection steals the best of who I am by reinforcing the worst of what’s been said to me.”

Uninvited by Lysa Terkeurst

Consequently, rejection tends to focus on lies instead of the truth. If you reject me, I hear (and believe) I am unworthy. Then I wonder if God agrees with you.

We embrace the role of the rejected. Who am I? The unwanted one. Why do we do this? Well, because we have allowed ourselves to become attached to the world and people over God.

Your identity must come from your Creator and Maker. Not your friend, spouse, children or enemies. They don’t know you as He does. They definitely don’t love you as He does. He will always Invite you.

He is a good, good Father.

The world is unstable, people are unstable. God is good. And God is good to you and me. He can turn the hurt and shame to good. We have to let Him. Trust what He says over what the neighbor says.

“The mind feasts on what it focuses on. What consumes my thinking will be the making or the breaking of my identity.”

Uninvited by Lysa Terqeurst

Your God Knows You and He Cherishes You

…and He COMPLETELY ACCEPTS YOU. Feast your mind on that. Not what ‘they’ say.”

Understanding of trials, betrayals and rejections may never come. Don’t focus on your need to know why it happened. Indeed, they may have you feeling Uninvited. Breathe and remember He always Invites you.

“Live in the abundant place that you are loved, and you won’t find yourself begging others for scraps of love.”

Uninvited by Lysa Terkeurst

Live Loved, It’s All Most of Us Want

You and I can trust Him with every hurt, every snub, every rejection. His love isn’t based on you or me. It’s given to us. A free gift placed gently and lovingly on us. And this is where we can live loved. Abide here. Stay here. Live here. Rejection never comes from Him.

In Uninvited we are admonished to abide like David. Think about how he was rejected. Not just by enemies, but by close family and friends. He hurt and lamented. But more importantly, he clung even closer to his God. And God gave him peace in the midst of his pain.

Psalm 88 is an anguished filled story of a man of God, who was rejected by those he loved. Read it and see what you think.

“People who care more about being right than ending right prove just how wrong they were all along.”


Let’s honor God in how we respond to rejection. Not because our rejectors deserve that. Because our Creator does. Even if others refuse to allow for a loving and grace-filled ending, we can do our best to chose one.

They may be stuck on how right they think their words or actions were.
They may not have indulged in introspection yet.
That’s their journey. Don’t let them be in charge of your response to your journey.

Pretty Woman feeling dejected

Rejection steals our sense of security as our normal is snatched away.

Indeed, we no longer live the same life once we are rejected. We must find a new normal.

I don’t know about you; but Lysa (author of Uninvitedmy friend, who doesn’t know I exist) and I like being known, liked, and understood. We like stability, faithfulness, loyalty, and kindness.

Rejection is a thief that steals all of that.

“Rejection steals the security of all we thought was beautiful and stable and leaves us scared and fragile and more vulnerable than ever”

Lysa Terkeurst, Uninvited

The balm? Grace. Yup. Go after Grace with all you have. Run to Grace as you have never run before. When I give grace to my rejectors and myself, rejection loses its sting.

Grace will guide you to transforming your humiliation into humility.

Uninvited? Is it Possible to Get Along with One Another?

People are diverse. Our individual perspectives are so unique. For a relationship to weather storms, there must be a commitment to communication. Transparent communication, where you genuinely seek to hear and understand each other. If your relationships don’t have that–step carefully. If others are not willing to communicate and work towards mutual understanding…these are precarious connections.

Without a doubt, most people think it is too scary to be transparent, to be open and authentic, to allow others to truly know us. But it isn’t difficult when you are in a relationship that is committed to communication.

“It’s simply acknowledging their feelings and identifying with them if you can…”

Uninvited by Lisa TerKeurst

Following the earlier example, it is not about always agreeing necessarily, but caring enough to listen and relate and put a tiny bit of effort into seeing things from a perspective not your own.

Free Gifts to Share: Acceptance. Belonging. Grace.

Accordingly, these are gifts we can bestow on each other. If we are willing.
Rejection states, “you don’t belong, you are not important, valuable or secure.” (Uninvited)
Whisper the opposite wherever you go and to whoever you are with. Live by Grace.

Rejection fills us with staggering humiliation. We must choose to allow rejection to turn into the gift of humility. God wants that for you. Humility is the beauty that He can and will create in your heart out of the pain you are experiencing.

The Hebrew word for set-apart is usually translated as holy. Set-apart is more accurate and actually more lovely and inspiring. His acceptance sets us apart. In Him. For Him. Whoever set you aside – it was not God. God sets you apart. Wholly and Holy His.

  • There are many more gems of insight and encouragement in this timely book.
  • I’ll leave you to it.
  • Get it.
  • Read it.
  • Embrace it.
  • Live Set Apart.
  • For Him.

Additional Resources for Processing

Please note that this article contains affiliate links. You can read my full disclosure at the bottom of the page.

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